so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Randomize
