used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
