I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
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