yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
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