Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
