she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
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