The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
