$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize