He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize