I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Randomize
