I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Success! We fucked roommates!
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
Randomize
