She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
Randomize