garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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