I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
Randomize
