? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
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