Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Randomize
