she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
