CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Randomize
