You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize