We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Randomize