I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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