his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
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