It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
