I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
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