we have pet lesbian snakes
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize