he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
Can't talk, ducks in the car
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize
