I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
I have tasted many bathrooms
Randomize
