It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
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