This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
