You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
