dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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