He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
Is it because I queefed?
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Randomize
