everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Randomize
