i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
