Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
My balls are so social today.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
