This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
