I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
I'm bleeding and have questions
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
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