Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
Randomize