what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
We need to feng shui this bitch.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
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