so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
i think i just lost a toe
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
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