Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
