shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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