This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
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