Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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