chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Randomize
