Joe is yelling at the trees again.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
Randomize
