THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
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