I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
