why didn't you poke me back
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
My life is pants optional.
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