i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Randomize
