I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize