She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
i drank out of a bidet.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
Randomize
