the condom got lost in my hair
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
ok first of all what the fuck
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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