Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
they need to just BURY HIM!
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
Randomize